21 Signs that You Should Never Travel to Switzerland

You don't get why people are fascinated by the swans.

You do not agree with the treatment of milk cows in Switzerland.

You are on a low-carb diet.

You think cog rail trains move too slowly. Why haven't they figured out a shortcut yet?

You don't understand why everyone is so fascinated about the Matterhorn.

Riding chair lifts makes you feel uncomfortable.

You don't like Alpine hiking paths because there is no cellular signal up there.

And the breathtaking vistas are just not rewarding enough for all that effort.

You think that munching on delicious Swiss chocolate in the place that coined the term is overrated.

You get confused by multilingualism. Most everyone speaks English, apart from German, French or Italian.

You heard that Swiss towns have no charm.

You are afraid that the mineral rich Swiss water will leave calcium stains.

You wonder why there is no walking escalator to cross that wooden bridge in Lucerne.

You believe that Swiss chalets are too quaint.

You don't like snow days.

You think that paying money to slide down a mountain on two boards is borderline crazy.

Too much untouched nature makes you feel uncomfortable.

And St. Bernard dogs freak you out.

You think graffitis are a disease for cities.

You are convinced that hanging bridges are more spectacular back home.

Game over! You've accidentally booked a flight to Swaziland, duh!

(Photo copyright St. Bernards by Berry Foundation; post inspired by saleduck.ch)