Bill Harby
The Swiss are not happy with their Olympic performance in the summer games. The team expected as many as seven medals, but received only four. Even World's Nicest Guy Roger Federer only got a silver, despite being able to play championship tennis in three languages.
In the wake of this disappointing medal count, the Swiss Olympic Committee has already submitted several new sports they want introduced to the 2016 summer games in Brazil:
100-meter Fondue-Stirring Hurdles
Secret Bank Account Badminton
Freestyle Watch-Making Marathon
Swiss Army Knife Fencing
Chocolate-Covered Floor Exercise
Uneven Bars Yodeling
Crossbow-Apple Father/Son Team Archery
The International Olympic Committee has not yet responded officially, but a source close to the committee commented that "Anything is possible with the support of the Swiss franc."
Dimitri Burkhard
Hmm, strange contribution. I must admit, either, I am a really dump and humourless person, though I very much appreciate British kind of humour, or I just do not understand what are the author’s resentment sources so he has to make this kind of contribution. I would not even expect such kind of bad humour by a SVP-Stammtisch (~ Swiss People Party-“regulars’ table”).
BTW: Regarding per capita achievements, regardless Switzerland’s rather below avarage olympic perfomance this year, its performance was still way better than the one of USA, China, or Germany for example. And if you do not count all the foreigners (~23%) these figures get even better! ;-))